YOUR values and why they matter in the counselling room

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Everyone has an individual set of values based on their own experience of life and these are often shared in the counselling room…sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously. It can be time well spent, pausing to reflect about what’s important to you…because understanding this improves your self-awareness and can offer insight into why you’re feeling the way that you are.

What are values?

Your values are the things that you believe are the most important. They influence and guide the choices and decisions you make in life, and the priorities you set. They’re unique to you.

Values can be a driving force and a great motivator. However, where things can sometimes go wrong, is when the actions and decisions that you make don’t match your core values. This can leave you feeling ill at ease, uncomfortable and discontent - and these are some of the feelings that can be shared in the counselling room.

To take a simple example, you may have found yourself in a job that increasingly takes you away from your young family…which may emerge as a problem as you progress through life and if one of your core values is family. It could be underpinning feelings of guilt, discontent, unhappiness and being “stuck” etc. This is the reason why it can be useful to explore a person’s values in the counselling room.

Exploring your own values and improving your self-awareness

If you’d like to spend some time reflecting on what YOUR values are, a few things to ponder over….

  • Values are often inherited…from our parents and from society at large. What values were you brought up with and how have they influenced you?

  • Your values can change with the different stages of life. What you felt was important aged 18 may be different to your values aged 40, for any number of reasons. Can you think of examples in your own life?

  • Your life experiences influence your values. Is there a value that has become more important to you because of a life experience you’ve had?

  • Our values show up in the way we react to other people and there can be an underlying clash in values. Can you reflect and think of behaviours that you dislike and why?

Understanding what’s matters most and improving your self-awareness helps you to get on track, stay on track and feel content.

Want some help?

As a counsellor and coach, I often do some work around values with my clients. Do you want some help identifying your core values? I’m happy to share more tips and guidance, just send me a message.